July 22

If You’re Not Public Speaking, You’re Being Selfish


As an entrepreneur, if you’re not public speaking, then you’re being selfish.

Now you might be like, “Hey Lucas, the fear of public speaking is the most common fear. How could you possibly say that I am selfish? I’m a caring individual, I’m empathetic, I’m very sensitive to other people’s needs.”

And to that, I say, “Yes, that’s great! But if you are not sharing your message, then you are doing everyone a disservice, because you have valuable information knowledge that could help people improve their lives, and yet your fears are stopping you from taking that action.

You’re Selfish If You’re Not Doing Public Speaking

Now when I say you’re selfish if you’re not doing public speaking, I don’t mean that you’re a bad person.

Instead, what I mean is that you’re allowing your personal fears to get in the way of helping you serve others.

And if we were to break things down, these fears typically manifest themselves in your mind as:

  • “I don’t want to look bad”
  • “I don’t want to embarrass myself”
  • “I don’t want to freeze and blank out”
  • “I don’t want to ruin my reputation”

These are all “I” statements. Also known as ego statements.

It’s where you allow your ego to get in the way of becoming a better version of yourself.

One Mindset Shift That Will Make You A More Confident Speaker

To become a more confident speaker, what you have to do is transcend your ego, and start focusing on the value that you’re providing to your audience.

When you start focusing on the audience, your fears drop off, and you start feeling more courageous with sharing your message in a bigger way.

In other words, when you start shifting your mindset from:

“I don’t want to embarrass myself.”

“I don’t want to look bad”

to I want to help people.”

“I want to help you improve your life.”

“What is it that you’re struggling with?”

“How can I be of service?

…you’ll quickly find your stress levels drop, and more power rising from within.

Step Into Your Power – Energy Is Infectious

After shifting your mindset, the next step is to stand in your power and speak with more conviction.


Well let’s say that you’re getting on stage, or you’re getting in front of these groups, or you’re doing your first videos. That’s great that you’re getting started somewhat.

But then you think to yourself:

  • “But I just don’t know how to start.”
  • “I feel very quiet.”
  • “I don’t want to offend anybody”
  • “I don’t want to be coming across a bit aggressive or too over the top.”

When this happens, you need to drop these thoughts and beliefs to the side because energy is infectious.

When you’re having fun, you’re putting the audience at ease.

That’s the most important part.

Because when you’re having fun, you’re relaxed. You’re enjoying your time on stage and as a result, your audience is going to be relaxed and enjoying it.

Step Into Your Power – Speak With Conviction

Speaking with conviction is a key trait of being a leader.

And in today’s world, people need to be led. They need a powerful leader who has the courage to put themselves out there, because no one else is willing to do it.

By thinking:

  • “I don’t want to come across too aggressive”
  • “I don’t want to come across too salesy”

You won’t be able to speak with conviction. And by not speaking with conviction, you’re ultimately being selfish because you’re not leading other people. You’re not sharing that message that they need to hear.

This is all about helping people change their lives.

When you share your message, you uplift everybody because you’re putting your offer out there – your offer, your product, your service – that’s what can actually help somebody change their life.

You giving a one-hour talk is not going to make enough impact.

Sure, they’re going to get some knowledge, and go, “Oh that’s interesting“.

But to undergo deep transformation, they need a deep experience in a training room, with a product, with a service.

That’s why I, myself, do 3-day intensives.

It’s because that’s what’s needed to really get in there, into the trenches of their minds in order to find out what fears are holding them back, and how they can move you forward from that.

Step Into Your Power – View Yourself As A Leader

Look at yourself as a leader. Move past yourself.

Speak with conviction because people are waiting for you to fully step up into your power and lead them to make the changes that they want in their life.

Again, when you are making your offer, when you’re making your sale, this isn’t about you making some money, this is about them changing their life.

For myself, when I’m giving a talk, I’m like, “Hey, if you buy, great, I’d love to work with you. If you don’t, I’m going to keep moving forward and working with my empowered leaders to step up and be thought leaders and make a difference in the world.”

If they don’t they’re going to stay stuck, and it’s unfortunate, but that’s the reality of it.

Related Article: If you have issues with selling your products and services as an entrepreneur, check out my post on the 4 reasons why you hold yourself back from selling

The only way a person changes is by stepping into the unknown world by doing something that scares them every single day and to do that, it requires making that investment – that leap of faith in themselves.

And in order for them to take that leap of faith, they need you to step up. They need you to hold them to that higher regard, because you believe in what’s possible for them.

When you do that, that’s when you’ll make an impact.

So instead of looking at the audience as a scary audience, get past yourself and your own ego, and say, “Hey, I’m here to help“. Then speak with conviction to lead them to where they want to go.

By doing so, the world changes and we all benefit.

Lucas Mattiello
Level Up Living

P.S. If you’ve decided you want to live to your true potential and you’d like the fast path to get there, here are 3 ways I can help you speak with confidence:

  1. Grab a free copy of my ‘6 Steps To Speak With Confidence’ guide
    It’s the 6-step process I use to take clients from anxious on stage to rock-solid confidence — Click Here
  2. Join the ‘Art Of Confident Speaking’ and connect with leaders who are improving too
    It’s our new Facebook community where smart leaders learn to level up their insight, impact and influence — Click Here
  3. Join my 3-day ‘Speak With Confidence Program’ and become a Case Study
    It’s the fastest way to become a confident communicator… If you’d like to work with me and a small group of highly motivated leaders like yourself — Click Here


energy is infectious, mindset shift, selfishness, speak with conviction, step into your power

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